Noise

28th January 2020

“Why is there such chaos outside the building asked my house-help to the cook?”

“Today is Ganesh Jayanti and the temple is having a grand celebration, she replied.”

She was referring to the small roadside shrine that housed a beautiful idol of the Elephant God.

Both of them completed their respective chores and left for the day.

I was seated in my favorite nook. It’s one of those days that had me in my low spirits when I simply wanted to bury myself under the blanket and go MIA for some time. I have been bummed out for a while trying to compose the mental chatter in my head.

While leaving the maid had asked me not to miss the pooja and go for at least a bit. I was in two minds. Should I really step out or rather be fine in my comfort zone?

I reluctantly agreed to myself thinking that I would only go if it’s fine with me going in my pajamas and I definitely am not changing my clothes.

The saner me simply agreed. 

The temple was crowded with people decked up and holding flower and fruit offerings mumbling different chants as they stood receiving strength. The surrounding area had festoons tied that created just the right festive fervor. The priest was patiently attending to every devotee as he himself uttered words of hope. 

In my physical appearance, I was clearly out of place. But, like everyone around I too had come seeking something. I was the loner. I was the crowd. 

I stood transfixed not knowing what to say. Is there a way to say a prayer so one can see the results, I wondered. 

I’m obviously not praying for the first time but everything I wanted to say seemed stale, powerless. I was missing my innocent childhood faith. I only wanted to collect back my broken pieces and get them together in one fully functional way. There’s too much to take in and I need a break from myself. 

Me: You do know everything that I want to say. Why don’t you simply set it all right?

He: You do know everything that’s to be done. Perhaps simply try doing them.

Someone rang the bell. On the outside that created some noise but in the inside it put off one 🙂