How To Stop Black And White Thinking

I was learning this online course through Skillshare on ‘Changing Your Brain’ and I came across the phrase “Black and White Thinking”. Upon learning more about it, I discovered that I am guilty of this practice and recognized the need to immediately work on it. It almost seemed like a second nature to perceive things in opposite spectrum. It needed attention. I needed to change.

Simultaneously, on Instagram there’s been some challenge where women have to post their B/W photos and tag other women as a way to show solidarity in supporting and standing up for fellow women. I don’t want to get into why these challenges are done or if they actually do work or serve a purpose, but I would like to stop it at if someone’s enjoying doing it, let them be. You appreciate the post or simply ignore and move on.

This post was an inspired combining the two.

Black and White Thinking

Have you found yourself using the terms “never” and “always” in arguments or even discussions only to realize later that it was never the extreme case? Do you look at things happening in your life with a ‘either or’ lens? Ever noticed how you tend to see everything as only one way or the other and there isn’t a third view to it?

I can never get this recipe right

Everybody will think I’m a failure all the time

I don’t know how to make good friends at all

Why am I always so unsorted and why is everything around me a mess

Black and white thinking in simple sense is thinking in the extremes.  It is an individual’s propensity to think in terms of polar opposites like ‘best and worst’, ‘all or nothing’, ‘good or bad’ and so on.

Viewing anything, any situation or relationships or even any life experiences as either being perfect or an utter failure has a major role to play in our mental well-being. The disorder that this kind of a thought process is associated with is called borderline personality disorder. It is generally characterized by instability in mood, relationships, self-image and even behavior. In its worst form, it manifests as uncontrollable temper and risks of self-injury.

We are familiar with those knee-jerk responses to headlines or perceived negatives that lead to endless arguments  because each party holds to his or her particular black and white perspective.

Why You Should Stop Polarized Thinking

This pattern of thinking is linked to human survival – our fight and flight response mechanisms and most of us engage in it from time to time. However, if it turns into a regular habit it can hurt both our mental and thereby physical health. Living on the extremes will cause one to physically burn out and bring along mental fatigue.  Due to the constant state of anxiety we tend to notice disruption in our relationships, career issues and declining peace of mind. Roller coasters are fun but not when it comes to human emotions. When there are mood swings similar to the pendulum it’s not healthy for anybody, having it or facing it.